Wisch List

Seeking new revenue streams, Ricketts family turns Wrigley Field into trendy French boutique for the offseason.

Today’s Wisch List column from the Kankakee Daily Journal …

Finding Zombieland in Chicagoland

The WISCH LIST

Oct. 31, 2009

Earlier this week on his Facebook page, a friend of mine wrote how “the economy is so bad that millions of children will hit the streets this weekend to beg for food.”

He called it the Trick-or-Treat Recovery Act of 2009.

Dental costs aren’t included.

Yeah, times may be tough right now. In spite of it, though, the business of Halloween remains scary good this October for many in Chicago.

The low-budget horror flick “Paranormal Activity” is earning big-budget dollars at the box office. People are paying $20 a pop to scare themselves silly at haunted houses. And I have friends who will probably spend more cash on their Halloween costumes this month than they will on their workday wardrobe.

For the cost-conscious thrill-seekers among us, though, I thought that I’d take you on a free tour of Chicagoland’s very own Ghost Town this Halloween.

It’s real (very). It’s open to the public (but, just barely). It’s creepy (quite).

And it can be found sitting in the shadow of one of the world’s busiest airports.

Or lurking there.

In the summer of 2001, Chicago Mayor Richard Daley unveiled his plans for the O’Hare Modernization Project, an effort designed to increase capacity and limit delays at the airport by extending old runways and building new ones.

The ongoing $6 billion project (it’s since grown to an estimated $8 billion, which the city attributes to inflation) called for the acquisition of more than 400 acres of land and the demolition of hundreds of suburban homes and business, most of them in Bensenville and Elk Grove Village.

A couple of months ago, I switched up my commute home to Chicago from work in the western suburbs. The new route cuts through Bensenville, and the first time I turned from northbound York Road onto eastbound Irving Park Road in the town, I was stunned at what I discovered.

For a mile long stretch along Irving Park, a post-apocalyptic world unfolded before me. Car dealerships, gas stations, restaurants and auto body repair shops stood shuttered and unoccupied. Weeds the size of children sprouted up from cracked concrete in front of them. And beyond the businesses, I could see down desolate neighborhood streets where houses sat unoccupied amidst a tangle of overgrown yards.

The “O’Hare Modernization Project” signs along Irving Park allowed me to quickly deduce the reason behind this bizarre scene. But I still found it surprising that a literal Ghost Town could exist so near Chicago and, judging by the amount of overgrowth, for so long.

For weeks, I’ve driven through this eerie stretch of suburbia. But it wasn’t until last week that I finally veered off of Irving Park Road and into the heart of Zombieland.

As I slowly drove through the neighborhoods, I found streets named Garden, Green Lawn and Orchard that are now suburban jungles. Along each, scores of houses and apartment buildings sat abandoned with plywood slapped over windows and doors. Basketball hoops and satellite dishes still stood outside some.

At one point, an enormous white-tailed buck and three does darted across the street, startling me. However, I was even more shocked when I turned down another street and found a home with its lights on, two cars in the driveway and a neatly manicured lawn with signs reading, “Don’t Meigs With Us” and “Build a Third Airport.”

Curious, I parked and knocked on the front door of the “survivors” in this wasteland. The man who answered didn’t much want to talk, but did tell me that he and his family had lived alone in the neighborhood for three years. Soon, they would be moving themselves, he said.

As I walked away, I wondered what this family’s life must be like in this neighborless hood. So, on Monday, I decided to find out and made my return to Zombieland, A.D.

After Dark.

As creepy as the neighborhood was in daylight, it was tenfold after dusk. The were sparse and flickering. Every “No Outlet” sign registered in my head as “Dead End.” And with my window down, the only sounds I could hear were my car’s tires passing over wet pavement, along with the occasional roar of an airliner from nearby O’Hare.

After enough shivers down my spine, I headed home.

The next day, though, to fully satisfy my curiosity, I did visit one other location in Bensenville that’s slated to be removed as part of the O’Hare Modernization Project.

It’s called St. Johannes, a 160-year-old cemetery.

Let’s just say I’d rather sleep there than on Garden Street.

Four years ago — back when the Wisch List was a blog at chicagotribune.com (just the third-ever blog for the Trib, by the way) —  I “investigated” an entertaining flurry of supposed Bigfoot sightings along the Illinois River near the town of Seneca for a print story and then delved into minds of Bigfoot believers in my blog.

As well as the history of Bigfoot sightings in the Land of Lincoln, which is much richer than you might realize.

Well, with it being Halloween Eve (All Hallow’s Eve Eve?) and all, I figured why not share a good monster story.

Remnants of the Wisch List still sort of exist (just barely) at chicagotribune.com, but the Bigfoot Field Researchers Organization (yes, there is such a thing) has my blog posted in its entirety on the BFRO Web site.

You can start the story here, and finish it there …

Bigfoot believers … what do they believe?

Oct. 10, 2005

By DAVE WISCHNOWSKY

Chicago Tribune

If this were Washington state, the rumors might not even raise an eyebrow.

If the City of Chicago were nestled in the heart of the Himalayas (I’d like to see Daniel Burnham’s urban plan for that one), the stories might be downright ho-hum.

But, reports of Bigfoot sightings … in Illinois?

Well, now, that’s unexpected.

But, would you believe it’s not the first time?

Not even close, as a matter of fact.

This summer, the Illinois River town of Seneca (pop. 2,053), located about 70 miles southwest of Chicago, produced reports of alleged Bigfoot encounters along a stretch of DuPont Road in a heavily-wooded area just south of the river.

Four accounts — two of which were from this June, while the others date to 1979 and 1983 — were deemed credible enough by a volunteer investigator with the Bigfoot Field Researchers Organization to be posted on the organization’s Web site, www.bfro.net.

The Seneca reports are among a total of 44 Illinois sightings listed on the BFRO site, with the oldest dating back to 1883, near Decatur.

That number actually gives Illinois the 16th-most documented Bigfoot sightings in the United States (one sighting behind Kentucky and one ahead of Indiana). Washington leads with 372, followed by California (322), Oregon (186) and — somewhat surprisingly — Ohio (181) and Texas (151).

It’s well known, of course, that there are people who believe in Bigfoot, and that includes some people living in the Land of Lincoln.

But what exactly do they believe in? And why do they believe in a creature that — in an era of satellite imagery, surveillance cameras and increased urbanization — has never been proven to exist?

To continue reading, visit the Bigfoot Field Researchers Organization official site …

This weekend’s column from the Kankakee Daily Journal, a little belated (I was out of town for a wedding, sorry) …

A Little Taste of Chicago

The WISCH LIST

Oct. 24, 2009

For my (Mayor Daley-taxed) money, there’s no better street in America on which to lose yourself during an autumn afternoon than Chicago’s Michigan Avenue.

So, this past Sunday on the Mag Mile, that’s precisely what I did.

I enjoyed a picture-perfect day. I people watched. I window shopped.

I dodged panhandlers.

I generally lost myself in the crowd.

And then I found what I was looking for.

For the better part of two years when I was working downtown, on my way to work, I’d stroll past 670 N. Michigan Ave.

Every time, without fail and no matter the weather, I’d find people at that location standing 15- to 20-deep outside the door, patiently waiting to squeeze into the tiny shop just so they could buy a bag of popcorn.

And bask in its aroma.

Garrett Popcorn has been a Chicago institution since 1949. It is said to have famous fans with some big names, such as Katie Holmes, Halle Berry, Pamela Anderson and Salma Hayek.

The franchise has five locations in the city, including one at Navy Pier and two at O’Hare. But none were as popular as the bustling flagship store on Michigan Avenue, which in 2008 closed after 25 years to make way for the ongoing construction of the Ritz Carlton Residences.

During my days downtown, I never had the time to pop in to Garrett. After all, showing up to work late and smelling like caramel corn wasn’t really an option.

(Although, had I seen Salma Hayek waiting in line I might have made an exception.)

Last week, though, Garrett Popcorn made its return to the Mag Mile, opening a new shop at 625 N. Michigan Ave. And so, Sunday, I returned.

To finally find out what all the fuss is about.

I walked down Michigan Avenue on Sunday, turned east on Ontario Street (where the new Garrett’s front door is actually located) and came upon the shop.
There wasn’t a line streaming out of the store, but inside more than 20 customers snaked back and forth beside a sign that read: “Patience. Good Things Come to Those Who Wait.”

After a few minutes of listening to the man behind me debate with his friend how much popcorn he could pack for his flight back home, I reached the counter and ordered a bag of Chicago Mix, a concoction featuring both Garrett’s CaramelCrisp and CheeseCorn.

The mix wasn’t cheap (a small bag set me back nearly $5), I have to say it was worth it. The CaramelCrisp is very good, the CheeseCorn, great.

As I walked back outside, my Garrett’s bag drew covetous looks from hungry passersby all the way to the pavilion outside Chicago’s historic Water Tower.

And it was there, among the pigeons, that I sat down, dug in and developed my lone complaint about Garrett Popcorn.

They didn’t give me a napkin.

Today’s Wisch List column from the Kankakee Daily Journal …

Halfway gone? Myself … and Ron Zook

The WISCH LIST

Oct. 17, 2009

I don’t leave sporting events early.

At least, I sure don’t very often.

I go to a baseball game, I’m there for nine innings (or 13). I take in a basketball tilt, I’m in my seat ’til the buzzer (even if it’s vs. Northeastern Southwesterly A&M). And if I attend a football game? Well, I expect to last all four quarters.

But last Saturday, I barely made it through two.

After watching Illinois muster a paltry 60 yards of offense to trail Michigan State 17-0 at halftime during Homecoming in chilly Champaign, I got up to buy a hot chocolate.

And never came home to my seat.

It had nothing to do with the weather. Unless the whether you’re talking about is if the Red Grange statue outside Memorial Stadium can move the ball better than the Illini offense this season.

Enough, quite simply, is enough.

And, with Illinois football, I had seen enough.

Enough offensive ineptness. Enough defensive breakdowns. Enough silly penalties. Enough off-field run-ins with the law. Enough frustrating losses.

And enough Ron Zook.

Since my freshman year at U of I in 1994, I’ve been a football season ticket holder for 13 of the past 15 years. And during that time, the Fighting Illini have gone to only four bowl games.

Last week in this space, I wrote that perhaps the only thing more baffling than the Chicago Cubs’ inability to win a World Series in 101 years is their inability to even reach one in 64.

Well, perhaps the only thing more baffling than that is Illinois’ inability to reach back-to-back bowl games for nearly two decades. In college football, it takes only six wins to qualify for the postseason, yet Illinois hasn’t accomplished that feat in consecutive years since 1991-92.

Since then, we’ve endured the Lou Tepper era, the Ron Turner era and, now, the Ron Zook era. And while I may not know the reason why Illini football can soar to great heights (2002 Sugar Bowl, 2008 Rose Bowl) but can’t sustain success, I do know that it’s time for the program to move on. Again.

Ron Zook needs to go.

Truth be told, I was never that excited about Zook’s hiring following his dismissal from Florida in 2004. I was encouraged with the recruiting upgrade he would likely provide Illinois, but I also knew that the Gators – who have since gone on to win two national championships under Urban Meyer – had let Zook go for a reason.

Mainly that he’s not cut out to be a head coach.

My skepticism about the hire was fed as early as Zook’s first press conference when he repeatedly mispronounced our state’s name as “Illinoise.” I let the malaprops slide, but did find it dubious.

The doubts were amplified in 2006 when I watched Zook inexplicably opt to go for two-point conversions twice (twice!) in the first quarter (the first quarter!) against Indiana in Champaign. The Illini failed both times and eventually blew a huge lead to lose 34-32.

By two points.

In 2007, I again sat mystified as Zook, rather than forcing Iowa to punt, twice accepted third-down penalties that instead helped the Hawkeyes score, resulting in a maddening 10-6 loss for the Illini in Iowa City.

Such simple coaching decisions shouldn’t cost a team wins.

This spring, I found myself again shaking my head at Zook when while serving as emcee at Illini event in Oak Brook he greeted the crowd by saying, “It’s great to be here with the University of Flori … Illinois.”

Yes, it was a slip-up. But five years into a relationship, should you really still be dropping your ex-wife’s name?

Look, I think Ron Zook’s a good guy. I don’t think he’s suited to run a major college program. He’s an energetic recruiter, but I also think his recruiting is overrated. Because, in Champaign, Zook’s “legend” was built largely on the recruitment of three highly-rated players: Juice Williams, Arrelious Benn and Martez Wilson, of which all three have been disappointments to varying degrees.

Otherwise, Illinois’ recruiting has been good, not great. Even with talent, however, you still have to develop it. Zook simply has not.

After reaching the Rose Bowl, there was no excuse for Illinois going 5-7 last season. And, this year, even if the 1-4 Illini are to somehow manage six wins and sneak into a bowl game, the season would still be an enormous flop based on the expectations set two years ago.

Ron Zook has had his five years. He’s failed. Illinois athletics director Ron Guenther cannot fail again, too. This time, he needs to hire a real head coach.

Not a defensive coordinator (Tepper). Not an offensive coordinator (Turner). Not a “recruiter” (Zook). A head coach.

A. Head. Coach.

Last Saturday, as I exited Memorial Stadium at halftime, two students were just having their tickets torn for the game.

“You guys are just getting here?” I said, sipping my hot chocolate. “You might as well turn around.”

They laughed, but didn’t turn around.

To avoid becoming a laughingstock, Illinois had better turn it around.

But it needs a new coach to show the way.

At the University of Illinois, the venerable Campustown bar C.O. Daniel’s is no more. For right now, at least. But you think you’re disappointed? Man, Hitler was really ticked when he got the news just before Homecoming. Thank God for Joe’s.

Today’s Wisch List column from the Kankakee Daily Journal …

If ‘Next Year’ finally happens, what then?

The WISCH LIST
Oct. 10, 2009

On Wednesday afternoon, with the first day of the 2009 Major League Baseball playoffs underway, my buddy in Chicago shot me a text message.

“What time do the Cubs play?” he asked in a query so heavy with sarcasm that if my iPhone had a tongue (is there an app for that?), it would have been permanently planted in its digital cheek.

After a wry chuckle and a frown, I texted back: “I think they play at a quarter past March.”

Unlike the past two Octobers when hope sprung nocturnal as Cubs fans prepared for postseason night games at the Friendly Confines, the ballpark and neighborhood stood quiet this week.

With the Cubs unable to sire a winner, the filming of the third installment of the “Meet The Parents” movie franchise by Ben Stiller & Co. a few blocks north of Wrigley Field was generating the only buzz in the neighborhood.

Perhaps one day they’ll film a championship at the ballpark, but it wasn’t on the menu this past Sunday when I went swan singing at Wrigley during the Cubs’ finale, a 5-2 loss that in spite of the team’s toe-tag status still drew the bulk of the 39,154 fans who had purchased tickets.

When I bought mine in February, I had hoped to spend the day at Wrigley celebrating a division championship and christening the Cubs on another postseason voyage, substituting a cup of Old Style for the bottle of champagne.

Alas, the only reference to top dog status at the ballpark on this day was the Miller Lite rooftop billboard across Sheffield Avenue, which boasted “First Place Taste” as it peered down on a second-place team.

When the final Cubs batter of the season struck out (quite fittingly), I strolled out of the ivy-covered burial ground to the tune of the organist playing “Auld Lang Syne,” as if celebrating the official start of “Next Year” on Chicago’s North Side is akin to ringing in the New Year.

And, perhaps, in some ways it is. There’s something bittersweet about both.

Now, just like every other long-suffering Cubs fan, I’ve often wondered what it would be like if the Lovable Losers actually did win the World Series.

There’s little doubt it would be amazing. The biggest sports story in the history of sports stories. In Chicago, the authorities likely would have to set up a demilitarized zone from Montrose Avenue to Fullerton and from Western Avenue to Lake Shore Drive just to contain the postgame celebration.

The city wouldn’t sleep for a week.

Well, White Sox fans might. But we’d make it difficult.

At the same time as imagining what Cubs fans would gain with a world championship, however, unlike most other fans I’ve also often pondered what we would lose.

Yes, lose.

With this season’s failure, the Cubs’ championship drought has now reached 101 years. And, while that’s a stunning number, I think it’s perhaps even more remarkable that the team hasn’t even reached a World Series in 64 years.

To not win, I can somewhat understand. Somewhat. It’s difficult to become a champion. But to not even get to the Series since 1945 – “the year we dropped the bomb on Japan” as Cubs balladeer Steve Goodman once sang – is incomprehensible.

Just getting there isn’t that hard. At least, it shouldn’t be.

But, for the Cubs it is.

And, of course, that’s what makes the team what it is. And, in turn, it’s what makes Cubs fans who they are.

The team’s star-crossed history has made its double-crossed fandom special. Not happy, mind you, but special. Because when you wear that Red Badge of Courage on the front of your Cubs cap, it does mean something – something that’s taken an entire century (now, plus one) to build.

But if the Cubs ever do win, all of that will be gone in an instant.

Poof. Just like that.

Being a Red Sox fan used to mean something, of course. They were the fatalistic fans who expected to lose, whereas Cubs fans hoped to win. With the playoff collapse of 2003, the identity of the Cubs fan changed somewhat and became more pessimistic.
But in 2004, the underdog identity of the Red Sox fan vanished forever.

With the team’s World Series title that year – followed by their second one in 2007 – rooting on the Red Sox became no different than rooting on the Yankees.

Both are rich and largely reviled.

With a title, the Cubs would likely become the same.

Now, don’t get me wrong, no one wants the Cubs to win more than me. But if and when (and if) it does happen, I’ll spend at least one moment in the thrill of victory paying the unique identity of the “Cubs fan” its final respects.

“Auld Lang Syne,” by the way, is Scottish for “old long ago” or “the good old days.” For Cubs fans, the days may not be so good, but they are old.

In a weird way, there’s something to be said for that.

And, hey, as a Cubs fan, sometimes you have to take what you can get.