Wisch List

Today’s newspaper column from The Daily Journal (Kankakee, Ill.) and The Times (Ottawa, Ill.) …

24 Hours of Oscars … and a grouch

The WISCH LIST

March 3, 2012

For 83 years, Hollywood’s stars have slapped each other’s backs and celebrated film at The Academy Awards. Last weekend, I spent almost that long sitting inside a theater doing the same.

Well, OK, not really. I didn’t slap anyone’s back.

But I did spend nearly 24 hours celebrating movies inside AMC River East 21 in downtown Chicago for the theater’s annual Best Picture Showcase. And, really, that’s about as long as any human can be expected to sit in the dark without a move to Barrow, Alaska.

Where, each winter, the sun doesn’t rise for two months.

Back in 1929, the first Academy Awards banquet was held with just 270 attendees paying $5 a ticket. Today, about 6,000 members of the Academy of Motion Picture Arts and Sciences vote each year with secret ballots to honor individuals and groups with merit in film.

The actors and filmmakers who win famously head home from the now nationally televised ceremony with 13.5-inch-tall, 8.5-pound golden Oscar statuettes in tow for their mantles. AMC Theatres says, “The award for Best Picture is arguably the most coveted of the year.”

As a result, for the past few years on Oscars weekend at select theaters nationwide, AMC’s Best Picture Showcase has given die-hard movie buffs an opportunity to watch all of the Oscar-nominated films – in a row – so they can suitably critique the field during Sunday night’s ceremony.

That is, if they’re still awake for it.

In January, my filmophile buddy Rob, a veteran of the Best Picture Showcase, invited me to run this movie ultra-marathon with him. Always a sucker for a unique experience, I agreed and purchased a my $60 ticket at amctheatres.com, which really was quite a deal for nine movies, especially considering it also included a $10 food voucher.

The event otherwise known as “24 Hours of Oscars” turned out to be a bit of a misnomer, as it didn’t last quite 24 hours (it was more like 22). However, in between my 9:15 a.m. departure on Saturday to secure a seat for the showcase’s 11 a.m. kickoff and my return home at 9:15 a.m. Sunday, an entire calendar day did indeed pass.

After which, I promptly passed out.

Surrounded by people armed with pillows, blankets and pajamas, Rob and I started our day at the movies (literally) with “Hugo” (in 3D) at 11 a.m., followed by the “The Tree of Life” at 1:20 p.m. and “The Help” at 3:55 p.m.

After an hour-long dinner break, the event resumed at 7:20 p.m. with “The Artist” and continued on through “The Descendants” at 9:20 p.m., “Midnight in Paris” at 11:30 p.m., “War Horse” at 1:20 a.m., “Moneyball” at 4 a.m. and “Extremely Loud & Incredibly Close” at 6:20 a.m.

With 15-minute intermissions in between each film, I ran strong through the first seven, before hitting a wall about midway through “Moneyball,” which I’d already seen. Sometime around 4:45 a.m. or so, I dozed off and then managed to also sleep through most of “Extremely Loud & Incredibly Close,” despite its noisy name.

Long before that, however, I’d already decided that “Midnight in Paris” was my favorite movie of 2012, but that “The Artist” was indeed the year’s Best Picture.

What surprised me the most about this marathon, which I would recommend in 2013 for film aficionados, was how quickly the time actually passed – well, except during Terrence Malick’s utterly nonsensical “The Tree of Life.” Meanwhile, what amused me the most was listening to the 20-something kid seated near me gripe about all the movies that should have been nominated this year.

But, hey, what are the Oscars without a grouch?

In honor of “Leap Day,”  I thought I’d run this column, which was originally published eight years ago in 2004 in The Daily Times (Ottawa, Ill.) and later that year in my book, “Northern IlliNOISE: Tales of a Territory” …

A Leap of Fate

The WISCH LIST

Feb. 23, 2004

Mary Lu Conness of Ottawa is married, has three children …

And come this Sunday, she’ll turn 12 years old.

Now, before you go jumping to any conclusions, try something else.

Leap to them, instead.

“I hear it all the time, all the time,” Conness said with a chuckle about the good-natured ribbing always associated with hers, the most peculiar of birthdays.

That being, Feb. 29.

Leap Day.

Since a normal year is actually more than 365 days — 365.242190, to be exact — every fourth year an extra day is tacked on to the month of February to round things out in an astronomical sort of way. So, like presidential elections, the Summer Olympics and high school graduation, Conness gets to enjoy her actual birthday only once every four years.

And, naturally, when the big day does roll around, it’s a big to-do.

“Ever since I went to grade school (in Chicago), kids would say ‘You’re turning 2 or you’re turning 4,’ ” said Conness, who will actually be turning 48 on Sunday. “There was always a surprise birthday party when I was growing up. The kids would always get into it, and even the teachers.”

Yes, with a birthday such as hers, you could say that Mary Lu Conness is one in a million.

Except, that she isn’t.

Instead, she’s one in 10 — million, that is.

“The really ironic thing is that my dad was born on Feb. 29 also,” Conness said about her late father, Edward Hughes of Chicago, with whom she took an enormous leap of fate. “There’s a 1 in 10 million chance — that’s what they put in the (Chicago) Tribune a few years ago — that a father and a child will both be born on Leap Year.”

Yep, when Mary Lu entered the world on Feb. 29, 1956, remarkably her father was blowing out the candles for birthday, as well.

His ninth birthday.

“He was born in 1920,” Conness said with a laugh about her dad. “So, yeah, he was 9 when he had me.

“He was a young father.”

Based on the latest figures, only about 200,000 people in the United States and approximately 4.1 million around the world were born Feb. 29.

And when Conness was born in ’56, those numbers were likely even lower, meaning that her family probably had the market pretty much cornered on Leap Year Babies in the Windy City during those days.

As a result, she and her father’s quantum leap made for some fun celebrations.

“He’d always receive phone calls,” Conness said about her father and the buzz surrounding their colossally coincidental birthday. “Guys from home, guys from college … And we’d always talk about who would come out on top with phone calls and cards that day … My father has now passed away, but my mom still feels that the 29th is such a big deal.”

She’s not the only one.

“My kids get a real charge out of it too,” Conness said about her three children, John, 16, Patrick, 15, and, especially, Mary Kate.

Who’s 12.

The same age that her mother will be this weekend.

“(On Sunday) I’ll be the same age as my daughter,” Conness said. “She’s excited, telling me ‘Mom, we’ll be the same age!’ But then she says, ‘I’ll be 13 in April, so then I’ll be older than you. But for a couple months we’ll be the same age.’ “

Today’s column from The Daily Journal (Kankakee, Ill.) and The Times (Ottawa, Ill.) …

The next Illini basketball coach better have wings

The WISCH LIST

Feb. 25, 2012

Caught in a nosedive so steep that it can’t seem to pull out no matter how hard Bruce Weber tugs on the busted controls, the University of Illinois basketball program is almost surely going to be hiring a new captain this spring.

But, when it does, Illini athletic director Mike Thomas should make sure the guy has his wings.

In the past week, Illinois hoops fans have watched with dismay as the Fighting Illini completely lost their fight during lopsided losses at Nebraska and Ohio State. Having now dropped six games in a row and eight of the past nine, this team hasn’t just burst its NCAA Tournament bubble heading into Sunday’s game against Iowa at Assembly Hall (5 p.m., BTN).

It’s popped the balloon on Weber’s job stability, as well.

As a result, the remainder of this 2011-12 basketball season is no longer about what’s happening now at Illinois. Rather, it’s about what will happen next.

And as speculation has begun to buzz about who could, should or would succeed Weber in Champaign, I’ve already found myself taking issue with some of the proposed coaching candidates.

Namely, those who aren’t college head coaches at all.

This week, for example, Comcast SportsNet Chicago’s Sam Aggrey was asked by an emailer, “I’ve heard rumors that Simeon [High School] coach Robert Smith could be in line for the Illinois job, have you heard anything and would he be a good fit there?”

Aggrey replied that “if Illinois came calling, [Smith] would have to listen,” before wisely adding, “But despite his success, the university might think it’s too big of a leap to go from coaching in the Chicago Public League’s Red-South division to the Big Ten.”

And indeed it would be. Hiring a high school coach, no matter how accomplished – and Smith undoubtedly is that, with four state titles – to be the head coach at a major college is folly. Just ask Notre Dame, who in 1981 hired Cincinnati Moeller football coach Gerry Faust after he had won five Ohio state titles in six seasons, only to see him go 30-26-1 during five years in South Bend.

Hiring Smith as Illinois’ head coach would be a mistake. Same goes for the apple of some other Illini fans’ eyes: current Illinois assistant Jerrance Howard. This past week it was suggested to me that Illinois fire Weber immediately so the 31-year-old Howard could have a “tryout” during the season’s final few games.

But I see no benefit in that. Quite simply, Howard needs to first show that he’s a head coach at all before becoming a candidate to be a head coach in the Big Ten. And he isn’t going to prove that this season in a handful of meaningless games with an Illini roster that’s mentally exhausted.

But even if the Illini did play better under Howard, what would that really show? After all, Mike Quade’s Cubs went 23-14 after he took over for Lou Piniella in 2010, but Quade proved to be a terrible hire.

By giving Howard a “tryout,” Illinois would only give him false hope that he could win the job. Then when he didn’t, a certain segment of the Illini fan base and perhaps Howard himself, would be angry and insulted.

It’s best for Illinois to simply let Weber finish out the season – it will be over soon enough – and then hire a new, proven head coach. Then, if that coach is smart, he’ll try to retain Howard as an assistant and perhaps even convince Robert Smith to join his staff, as well.

And, that, to me is an idea that could truly fly.

Find Chicago’s bleeding hearts at Tommy Gun’s Garage

The WISCH LIST

Feb. 18, 2011

At Tommy Gun’s Garage, Valentine’s Day isn’t for the faint of heart. But on Tuesday night, the longtime “speakeasy” in Chicago’s Far South Loop was certainly good for a laugh.

Or, you know, 30.

This week, while countless other couples throughout Chicagoland were dining by candlelight, my girlfriend and I instead chose to spend our Valentine’s Day evening in a different setting.

We enjoyed dinner lit by gunfire.

But, believe me, there was also plenty of romance – that of Chicago’s 1920s-era variety – at Tommy Gun’s, the city’s longest-running audience interactive dinner show which this year celebrates its 25th anniversary.

Located at 2114 S. Wabash Ave. in a nondescript brick building that even Elliot Ness would pass by, Tommy Gun’s was founded in 1987, but the joint exists in the Roaring Twenties. Upon entering – after you’ve given “Gloves” the doorman the password – visitors are instantly transported back to the age of Prohibition, when mobsters and molls ruled the Windy City.

Inside the venue, you’ll encounter wisecracking wiseguys with names such as “Buggsy,” “Knuckles” and “Rocco” and smart-aleck flappers like “Kitty” and “Roxy,” who not only take your dinner orders, but also leap up on stage to sing and dance and all that jazz.

The lively two-hour show ($65 per person) is hosted by Tommy Gun’s maître d’ “Vito Calamari,” who carries around a wooden baseball bat and, if you happen get up to use the restroom, is liable to steal your seat and try to steal your date.

Twice, in my case.

Each year on Valentine’s Day, Tommy Gun’s adds a macabre twist to its standard song and dance by ending its show with a re-enactment of the infamous “St. Valentine’s Day Massacre,” which took place on Chicago’s North Side on Feb. 14, 1929.

Back then, Al Capone’s gang was at war with George “Bugs” Moran for control of the city’s bootlegging market. Not long before Valentine’s Day, Moran and one of his henchmen had murdered a Capone associate, prompting Capone to decide that enough was enough.

In an attempt to eliminate Moran, Capone arranged to have him informed that a special shipment of bootleg whiskey would be shipped to a garage at 2122 N. Clark St. owned by Moran. When seven of Moran’s associates arrived at the location, four of Capone’s men stormed in posing as police officers conducting a raid.

The “cops” lined Moran’s men against a wall, pulled machine guns out from beneath their overcoats and opened fire. Moran was not present and survived. Capone, meanwhile, was in Florida and police were unable to link him to the crime. In fact, no one was ever tried in the killings.

The garage where the massacre took place, known as “SMC Cartage Company,” was torn down in 1967. Today, the lot is occupied by a Chicago Housing Authority development for seniors, although the bricks from the wall against which the victims were lined up has gone on an odd post-demolition journey.

Canadian businessman George Patey first bought the wall’s bricks at an auction and then reassembled them in the men’s room of his Banjo Palace nightclub in Vancouver. Reportedly, the bricks became a urinal wall that featured, um, conveniently placed targets.

In 1976, the Banjo Palace closed and the wall was again put up for auction, one brick at a time. Today, some of those bricks have been reassembled inside the new Mob Museum in Las Vegas, which happens to have celebrated its grand opening this week.

On Valentine’s Day.

For more information, visit tommygunsgarage.com or call 733-RAT-A-TAT. The theater includes a parking lot and is located near Lake Shore Drive and the Stevenson Expressway (I-55).

Today’s newspaper column from The Daily Journal (Kankakee, Ill.) and The Times (Ottawa, Ill.) …

Looking for love on the Illinois’ sports scene

The WISCH LIST

Feb. 11, 2012

It’s just three days until Valentine’s Day, but I’m having a hard time finding the love.

For the state’s sports teams, that is.

Right now, the Illini basketball program is stuck in neutral, at best. Reverse, at worst. As spring training approaches, both the Cubs and the White Sox appear to be in rebuilding modes not seen around these parts since after the Great Chicago Fire.

Up at Halas Hall, the Bears have changed general managers, but it’s unclear if they’ve actually changed direction. And out on the ice, the Blackhawks seem to have slipped. Badly.

But, hey, as V-Day nears, we can at least say thanks to the Bulls giving us a Rose.

And with that, I wanted to share with you a few more thoughts. All from the heart, of course.

Delayed sales? That’s the ticket

Last year, single-game tickets for the Chicago Cubs went on sale on Feb. 25. This year, according to the ballclub, it won’t happen until March 9.

That’s almost two weeks later than usual and less than a month before Opening Day, set for April 5 at Wrigley Field.

So, what’s the deal with the delay?

Well, I don’t know for sure, but my suspicion is that it’s a sign of just how concerned the Cubs are about ticket sales this season. Last year, after the North Siders tumbled out of the division race – and, really, well before that – fans were steering clear of Wrigley in numbers not seen for ages.

With Theo Epstein’s new regime making it quite clear that the Cubs aren’t really trying to compete in 2012, the demand for tickets is likely to be even cooler now. My guess is that the Cubs are hoping that by pushing back the sales date for single game tickets, more fans will get antsy and buy the “9-Game Packs” the team has promoted since January.

Come March, it’ll be interesting to see if Cubs tickets are a hit. Or if the team strikes out.

Miami takes Chicago

Ozzie Guillen went there. Mark Buehrle followed him. And then so did Carlos Zambrano.

This offseason, the newly named Miami Marlins have been attracting Chicago’s biggest baseball names like they’re snowbirds from New York. And now, it appears that MLB’s new big spenders – exactly where are the Marlins getting all this money? – may pluck another star from the Windy City before he even arrived in Chicago.

According to a report in the Orlando Sun-Sentinel, Yoenis Cespedes, the 26-year-old hotshot Cuban defector that both the Cubs and White Sox have reportedly been targeting as the future of their outfield, is likely headed to the Marlins for a four-year deal worth up to $40 million.

With neither the Cubs nor the Sox putting much star power on the field right now, Cespedes would have given fans a reason to pay attention. Instead, though, it appears the Marlins will be the ones paying him.

Somehow.

Illini sing the blues

Ron Zook is out in Champaign. And it’s looking increasingly likely that Bruce Weber may soon follow him.

If new Illinois athletic director Mike Thomas does make that call, it brings up an interesting question. Has any major-conference AD fired both his football and men’s basketball coaches in the same season before? Perhaps it has happened (I couldn’t track down an example), but find it unlikely that any AD has turned that trick in his first year.

With Jolette Law’s women’s basketball program also struggling, however, it’s possible Thomas could fire all three of Illinois’ highest profile coaches in the span of just a few months.

And I can’t imagine that’s ever happened before.

From the Saturday, Feb. 4, editions of The Daily Journal (Kankakee, Ill.) and The Times (Ottawa, Ill.) …

Shadowing the colorful past of Lake Shore Drive

The WISCH LIST

Feb. 4, 2012

This year, Groundhog Day didn’t repeat itself.

Thank goodness.

On Feb. 2, one year ago, I was bundled up like an Eskimo and hiking along a barren Lake Shore Drive as I explored Chicago after “Snowmaggedon,” the infamous blizzard that dumped more than 21 inches of the white stuff on the city over a three-day stretch.

This year, with temperatures in the 50s, I half wanted to drive LSD down to North Avenue to spend the day at the beach.

Shadows, or no shadows.

Last year’s historic snowstorm paralyzed Chicagoland for days, most notoriously putting Lake Shore Drive itself into a deep freeze as hundreds of cars were left stranded by the Arctic blast featuring 70 mph winds off Lake Michigan.

Groundhog Day 2011 was a particularly bad one for America’s Greatest Roadway, which has since become wiser with the installation of removable barriers to reroute traffic and additional cameras to monitor weather conditions.

Last weekend, however, I drove LSD on one of its better days – for January, at least – and afterward dug into, not snow, but its history …

Driving along … LED?

Lake Shore Drive has always been along Chicago’s lakeshore, of course. But it hasn’t always been Lake Shore Drive.

When the thoroughfare’s downtown stretch first opened in 1937, the roadway was actually named Leif Ericson Drive after the legendary Norse explorer who is regarded as the first European to have landed in North America (reaching Newfoundland), a good 500 hundred years before Christopher Columbus.

The road was also referred to as Field Boulevard for a time before it was officially renamed Lake Shore Drive in 1946.

Palmer’s personal driveway

Lake Shore Drive actually traces its origins to the colossal political clout of famed Windy City businessman Potter Palmer (1826-1902), who was responsible for much of the development of State Street and for whom Chicago’s iconic Palmer House Hotel is named.

In the early 1880s, Palmer strong-armed the city into building a street adjacent to his lakefront property in order to enhance its value. In 1882, he then went on to begin construction of an opulent “castle,” completing it in 1885 at a cost of more than $1 million.

At the time, the mansion – located at present-day 1350 N. Lake Shore Drive – was the largest private residence in Chicago and established city’s upscale “Gold Coast” neighborhood.

Its design was reportedly based on a German castle and featured a three-story central hall under a glass dome, along with rooms decorated in various historic styles. They included a Louis XVI salon, an Indian room, a Renaissance library and a Moorish room where the rugs were saturated with perfumes.
Palmer’s castle, which was demolished in 1951, also featured an 80-foot spiral staircase, two elevators and outside doors that had no locks or knobs. The only way to get in was to be admitted from the inside.

Or, perhaps, by drawbridge.

The inners and outers of LSD

Originally, Palmer’s personal roadway was intended for the wealthy to take leisurely rides in their carriages. But, as the age of the automobile dawned, it took on a different role.

Today, Lake Shore Drive is actually two completely separate roads. There’s the outer drive that runs express from Chicago’s South Side up to Hollywood Avenue in the Edgewater neighborhood and provides sweeping views of the skyline and lakefront.

But Palmer’s original inner (or local) drive still exists, as well, extending from downtown in Streeterville to North Avenue before it ends and reappears at Diversey Parkway, continuing north to its terminus at Irving Park Road.

The road is still home to expensive homes and high-rises, but this year, (almost) no snow.

Today’s newspaper column from The Daily Journal (Kankakee, Ill.) and The Times (Ottawa, Ill.) …

Chicago’s history of heists is a rich one

The WISCH LIST

Jan. 28, 2012

From “Ocean’s Eleven” to “Inception,” “The Usual Suspects” to “The Italian Job,” and “The Sting” to, heck, “The Great Muppet Caper,” I’ve always been fascinated by a good heist story.

That’s why last week, I read with interest about the Chicago media’s recounting of the tale of reputed Windy City mobsters Joseph Scalise and Arthur Rachel, who in 1980 donned disguises to rob the legendary egg-shaped Marlborough Diamond from a London jewelry store.

After an astute passerby recorded the license plate of their rental car, Scalise and Rachel were arrested hours later when they stepped off their plane at O’Hare International Airport. For the crime, both men did 13 years in a British prison, although the 45-carat Marlborough Diamond – valued at $960,000 at the time of the theft – remains missing to this day.

Last week, Scalise and Rachel, both 73, were facing federal charges for having planned strong-armed robberies and home invasions as recently as 2010 when they were arrested outside the Bridgeport home of deceased mobster Angelo “The Hook” Pietra. Scalise accepted a deal to plead guilty, while Rachel opted to for a bench trial. On Thursday, he was found guilty by a judge.

As home to John Dillinger, Chicago of course is no stranger to high-profile heists. But its legacy of robbery goes well beyond “Public Enemy No. 1,” and today I thought I’d share a few things about Windy City thievery that you might not know about.

Chief of Thieves

One of Chicago’s most notorious robbers was William A. Hanhardt, who pleaded guilty in 2001 to charges of leading a nationwide ring of thieves that stole nearly $4.85 million worth of jewels.

The interesting thing about Hanhardt, who was just released from prison on Jan. 13, is he once headed the Chicago Police Department’s burglary unit and used police computers to track jewelry salesmen for his heists.

The banks are open

During my stint as a Chicago Tribune Metro reporter from 2005 to 2007, I spent my many a Saturday night at the Tribune Tower keeping tabs on murder and mayhem in the Windy City.

Much of that mayhem involved bank robberies, which peaked in 2006 with a whopping 284 in the Chicago area. Since then, the numbers have decreased dramatically. In 2011, there were 112 bank robberies in Cook, DuPage, Kane, Lake and Will counties, down from 181 the year before.

“It’s a significant decrease, and it’s interesting to note we had over 200 a year for four or five consecutive years,” said Ross Rice, spokesman for the FBI’s Chicago office, who recently attributed the drop to a 70 percent arrest rate, heavy media coverage and technological advancements, including the FBI’s three-year-old website bandittrackerchicago.com.

What’s in a name?

Perhaps the quirkiest thing about Chicago-area robbers is the nicknames bestowed upon them by the authorities.

In recent years, there’s been the “Swine Flu Bandit” (for his surgical mask), the “Quick-Change Bandit” (for his second set of clothes) and the “Double Dip Bandit” (who would rob the same bank twice).

There’s been the “Wicker Park Bandit” (for his neighborhood of choice), the “Tire Iron Bandit” (for his weapon of choice) and the “Winnie the Pooh Bandit” (for his sweatshirt of choice), as well as the “Stick Figure Bandit” (for his slim build), the “Polite Bandit” (who apologized while robbing) and the “Wheaton Bandit” (who was never caught after stealing $100,000 from 16 suburban banks from 2002 to 2006).

One robber who wasn’t nicknamed was whomever pried open a huge steel door at a West Side beauty salon last April and, according to police, ran off with a “very valuable” amount of human hair.

But I have a suggestion: the “Head Bandit.”

This weekend’s newspaper column from The Daily Journal (Kankakee, Ill.) and The Times (Ottawa, Ill.) …

Taking a few more swings at Hall of Fame voting

The WISCH LIST

Jan. 21, 2012

Last weekend in downtown Chicago, the Cubs Convention passed for the second straight year without Ron Santo in attendance. Come this summer in upstate New York, Major League Baseball’s annual Hall of Fame Induction Ceremony will do the same.

Even though No. 10 is finally in its lineup.

Last month, I got riled up after Santo – the longtime Cubs third baseman, WGN radio announcer and Cooperstown pariah – was voted in to the Hall of Fame almost a year to the day after he had passed away at the age of 70.

If he’s good enough now, I asked, then why wasn’t he before?

Today, I’m riled up again because last week former Cincinnati Reds shortstop Barry Larkin was voted into the HOF Class of 2012, where his living self will join Santo’s ghost in Cooperstown this July.

The reason for my irritation is that Larkin, a player whose career numbers (.295 average, 198 home runs, 960 RBI) are no more impressive than Santo’s (.277, 342, 1,343), had to wait a mere three years to be voted in to the Hall after he became eligible. Santo, on the other hand, had to wait a lifetime to have his ticket punched.

Quite literally.

And that makes no sense.

In fact, there’s no sense to the entire Hall of Fame voting process, which in large part inducted Larkin because he was in the right place at the right time. In other words, he was eligible during a year when there were really no other worthy candidates up for vote.

I don’t think there’s any doubt that the Hall of Fame is under pressure to induct at least one recently retired player every year, whether it’s truly merited or not. After all, the show must go on.

That fact creates a bizarre inequity in HOF induction as players simply don’t become more eligible after spending multiple years on the ballot. For example, it’s not as if Santo’s statistics improved after his death. They were the same numbers he had when he first became eligible for the Hall of Fame in 1979. Nothing has changed except for his death.

As I wrote last month, I think there should be first-ballot Hall of Famers (the true elites) and then Hall of Famers, who should then be voted in during their second year of eligibility. If a player doesn’t earn the required 75 percent of the vote by his second year on the ballot, he should fall off it. If that had happened with Santo’s HOF bid, so be it. At least it’s logical, standardized and fair.

Instead, though, voters undergo this silly practice of making some borderline players (such as Andre Dawson) “bide their time” while others (such as Larkin) are voted in quickly because, well, somebody had to get in this year.

A friend of mine actually proposed the idea that players should only be eligible for Hall of Fame induction once. If they earn 75 percent of the vote in their year of eligibility, they’re inducted, he said. If they earn better than 90 percent, they’re then placed in the Hall’s “Elite Wing.”

At first, that sounded like a pretty good idea to me. That is, until I realized that undisputable “elites” such as Joe DiMaggio (89.16 percent), Mickey Mantle (88.22) and Sandy Koufax (86.87) are among those who didn’t earn 90 percent of the Hall of Fame vote, while questionable “elites” Jim Palmer (92.57), Ozzie Smith (91.74) and Roberto Alomar (90.1) are among those who did.

Like I said, Hall of Fame voting makes no sense.

In fact, I’d say it’s a bust.

From the Saturday, Jan. 14, editions of The Daily Journal (Kankakee, Ill.) and The Times (Ottawa, Ill.) …

Chicago’s Chinatown celebrates its first century

The WISCH LIST

Jan. 14, 2012

The drive from downtown Ottawa to the corner of Cermak Road and Archer Avenue on Chicago’s South Side is a distance of only 82 miles.

But by making that trip, you’ll find yourself an entire world away.

Home to the heart of Chicago’s Chinatown neighborhood, the area centered surrounding the intersections of Cermak, Archer and Wentworth Avenue is one of the oldest Chinese settlements in America.

Old enough, in fact, that Chicago’s Chinatown celebrates its 100th anniversary this year, making now as good as time as any to visit one of the most distinct areas in all of Chicago.

That’s just what I did this past Sunday, as I made my first ever trip to Chinatown Square to sample the area’s unique culture and, of course, taste its cuisine. Today, in recognition of Chinatown’s 100th birthday, I thought I’d let you know a bit about the neighborhood.

The history

In 1912, the Republic of China was formed, putting an end to China’s last dynasty – the Qing – and more than 2,000 years of imperial rule.
That same year in Chicago’s Armour Square neighborhood, Chinatown was officially founded, providing a permanent settlement for the Chinese residents who began arriving in the city in 1869 when the First Transcontinental Railroad was completed.

By the 1920s, Chicago’s Chinatown leaders decided that a Chinese-style building should be built to provide a strong visual announcement of their new presence in the area. But, with no Chinese-born architects in Chicago at the time, the community turned to a pair of Chicago-born Norse architects who studied texts on Chinese architecture.

In the spring of 1926, construction of the new On Leong Merchants Association Building was completed with the Norsemen’s final design an example of Orientalism, considered to be a Western architect’s interpretation of Chinese architectural forms.

Today, the neighborhood’s anchor and most recognizable feature is Chinatown Square, a two-level mall built in the late 1980s along Archer Avenue and consisting of restaurants, beauty salons and various business offices.

The cuisine

It was Chinatown Square that my girlfriend and I visited on Sunday for lunch at Cai (2100 S. Archer Ave.), one of the area’s newest and most popular restaurants.

After accidentally entering the dining room through a back door (note: don’t do that, use the mall entrance), we were seated and ordered an array of dim sum dishes from an American-friendly picture menu.

The entrees were bite-sized, but big ones, as the shrimp and pork dumplings, sticky rice and chicken wrapped in lotus leaves, short ribs, bean crepe-wrapped pork and seafood soup was far too much food, but still cost only $42 for two people. And we departed with leftovers – delicious ones.

The travel tips

Beyond its restaurants, of which they are many, Chinatown Square’s atmosphere simply differs a great deal from anywhere else in Chicago. It’s like taking a trip overseas in your car, and the experience of exploring Chinatown’s shops and bakeries and admiring its sculptures is certainly worth a visit.

Getting there is easy. From the southwest, simply take the Stevenson Expressway (I-55) to the Cermak Rd. exit and head west to the Chinatown Gate.
Metered street parking is plentiful during the week, but on weekends you may need to use a pay lot. One across from Three Happiness Restaurant (2130 S. Wentworth Ave.) costs only $2 for three hours with validation from participating restaurants. Another lot at Wentworth and 24th Street does not offer validation, but is still relatively inexpensive.

Chinatown can also easily be accessed via the CTA Red Line at the Cermak-Chinatown stop.

This weekend’s newspaper column from The Daily Journal (Kankakee, Ill.) and The Times (Ottawa, Ill.) …

Start the New Year off right in Chicago

The WISCH LIST

Jan. 7, 2012

The holidays are over (according to the Gregorian calendar) and the end of the world is nigh (according to the Mayan one).

But in between now and Dec. 21 – the day when the Mayan calendar runs out of, well, days – there’s still plenty going on, especially up in Chicago.

Now, I wouldn’t say I’m particularly concerned about Armageddon arriving this December – no matter what the might have crunched down in ancient Mexico – but I suppose you might still want to live it up a bit in 2012.

You know, just in case.

And if you do, here are a few fun ways to start the New Year right in the Windy City this month. You can thank me later that none include watching a John Cusack disaster flick.

Skate in the sky

This past Tuesday afternoon while walking through the Loop, I stared with amusement as a man strolled past me while carrying an ice cream cone in each hand.

It was 23 degrees at the time.

I suppose the cones didn’t melt, at least.

So far this winter, Chicago’s mild temperatures – which returned again on Wednesday – have pleased most city-dwellers, except perhaps those wanting to ice skate. On Jan. 1, however, a remedy for the warm weather arrived when the John Hancock Observatory opened its “Skating in the Sky” for a second season.

Through April 8, visitors to the Hancock Center’s 94th floor can skate on a synthetic indoor rink perched more than 1,000 feet above Michigan Avenue. Billed as the “highest skating rink in the world,” the venue offers unobstructed views of Lake Michigan and the city. A 25-minute skating session costs $5, on top Hancock’s general $15 admission for ages 12 and up and $10 for ages 3 to 11. Skate rental is available for $1. For hours and additional information, Visit jhochicago.com.

Or skate at Wrigley

For years, Carlos Zambrano skated on thin ice at Wrigley Field. Now that he’s finally gone, if you’d like to imitate him by doing the same – on thicker ice – the Rink at Wrigley Field is again open through Feb. 26. But, please, leave the water coolers in peace.

Located at Clark and Waveland, the rink costs $5 for adults and $3 for children on weekdays and $10 for adults and $6 for children on Friday, Saturdays and Sundays. Skate rental is available. For hours and additional information, visit cubs.com.

Live high-brow

At one million square feet, the Art Institute of Chicago (111 S. Michigan Ave.) is the second largest art museum in the U.S. behind only the Metropolitan Museum of Art in New York City.

And from now through Feb. 10, it’s free for all Illinois residents to explore it on weekdays. That’s a savings of up to $18 per visitor, so if your resolution was to class things up in 2012, there’s probably no better time to get started than during the next month. For more information, visit artic.edu.

Or laugh low-brow

If high art isn’t your thing, then perhaps silly humor is.

If so, Chicago has it for you this month.

The 11th annual Chicago Sketch Comedy Festival is the nation’s largest and runs Jan. 5-15 at Stage 773 at 1225 W. Belmont Ave.

The festival began in 2000 with 33 sketch groups and now features 138, selected from 250 local, national and international entrants by a panel of judges. Last year, 10,000 fans from around the globe attended the eight days of shtick in the heart of Chicago’s Lakeview neighborhood. To purchase tickets and get additional information, visit chicagosketchfest.com.