Although, that 2005 needs to be airbrushed out and replaced with, I dunno, 3005? That sounds about right.

Maybe.

Today’s column from the Kankakee Daily Journal and The (Ottawa, Ill.) Times …

At U of I, mascots are for the birds

The WISCH LIST

April 24, 2010

The Chicago Bulls can have their Benny. The Bears can trot Staley out onto Soldier Field as much as they like. And the Phillie Phanatic is Phantastic … for Philadelphia.

But when it comes to mascots and the University of Illinois – an idea proposed last month by the Illinois Student Senate – any such notion is for the birds.

Literally.

Go back with me to Jan. 14, 1982, when the Illini hosted Ohio State in a basketball game during which the curtain was raised – and mercifully dropped – on one of the most ill-fated moments in school history with the unveiling of the “Orange and Blue Bird.”

“It was a bird of ill repute the moment it appeared on the floor,” the Daily Illini reported after Illinois’ 51-50 loss in overtime. “When a new-fangled yellow, fine-feathered mascot was introduced to Illinois fans prior to the Illini’s contest against Ohio State Thursday night, verbal abuse was its immediate greeting.”

Decked out in a Fighting Illini T-shirt and blue high-top gym shoes, the “O-B Bird” – probably inspired by the popularity of the San Diego Chicken – was heckled off the court. And the next day, with rumors swirling that the bird was an attempt to ease out beloved university symbol Chief Illiniwek, who had just begun falling under attack from critics, campus officials quickly backtracked.

Illinois associate athletic director Vance Redfern claimed the “O-B Bird” was not a mascot, but was created to “get hype and get home-court advantage” at Assembly Hall. Redfern added that he was “a little disturbed” by the reception received by the bird.

I don’t know where Vance is today, but I’m judging from the tale of the “O-B Bird” that if he were still around, he’d urge the university’s student senators to enroll in a history class.

And learn from it.

In March, the Student Senate’s so-called “Unity” resolution – approved by an 18-9 vote – asked interim Chancellor Robert Easter to convene a task force to find a mascot that can unify the campus. Since 2007, when Chief Illiniwek was retired despite enormous campus and statewide popularity, the university has been without an official symbol.

“There’s a real divide among students of the university,” said student senator Carey Ash, who sponsored the “Unity” resolution. “It’s the responsibility of student leaders to not only acknowledge but also make progress toward resolving it. We haven’t fully resolved all the issues of the past, and we need to move forward.”

What Ash doesn’t seem to grasp, however, is that moving forward by picking a mascot – ideas proposed by one campus student organization include the “Fighting Abe Lincolns” and the “Fire Chiefs” (it’s unclear if they were serious) – is not forward movement at all. In fact, I can’t imagine anything less “unifying” for U of I than a university-mandated mascot.

Fact is, there’s nothing in this world – except perhaps death (but not taxes) – that everyone can agree on. But let’s try to agree on this: the University of Illinois has never had a mascot.

And I don’t think it ever should.

Chief Illiniwek was a symbol, not a mascot. He was not Bucky Badger. He was not Sparty the Spartan. Opposing cheerleaders didn’t ram the Chief into goalposts during football games. And he didn’t run along the sidelines at Assembly Hall, tossing buckets of confetti into the crowd.

“That was never our role,” said Steve Raquel, a Champaign native who portrayed Chief Illiniwek during the early 1990s. “Our role was to be very respectful. Yeah, it was definitely entertaining. But our role as the Chief was very specific, and we stayed within those lines.

“We were symbolic of the University of Illinois and the Illini Tribe that we tried to hold in high esteem.”

Following last month’s senate resolution, campus Chief supporters – who took part in a student rally this past Wednesday – organized a group, “Illini Against a Mascot,” that now has nearly 3,500 fans on Facebook.

“Myself and a bunch of others thought the idea was absolutely ridiculous,” explained Roberto Martell, a U of I senior who founded “Illini Against a Mascot.” “They want to replace the honorable Chief Illiniwek with an amorphous blob. It would have to be gray, because you wouldn’t want it to be too flashy. Someone would get offended.”

Raquel added, “Whatever you would pick today, it has every possibility in the next generation to be offensive. Everything has the potential to be offensive to someone. Even something like a Blue Jay, you could have some group that’s against mascots that are birds.”

Like Illinois fans, circa 1982.

My advice to U of I is to just leave things well enough alone. Either let the university’s symbol be some form of Chief Illiniwek.

Or just let it be.

Today’s column from the Kankakee Daily Journal and The (Ottawa, Ill.) Times …

New MSI exhibit takes Chicago by storm

The WISCH LIST

April 17, 2010

It’s Monday morning at the Museum of Science and Industry in Chicago, and half a dozen elementary schoolchildren on Spring Break are about to be asked about a touchy topic.

In front of their parents, no less.

“Who’s ever taken a bath before?” Lisa, a guide for the Tornado Vortex display at MSI’s dazzling new “Science Storms” exhibit, says with a grin to the pack of youngsters standing in front of her alongside their chuckling parents.

Each little boy and girl raises a hand in the air – reluctantly, it seems, in a couple of cases – and confess that, yes, they have indeed bathed before.

(But don’t ask about washing behind the ears.)

As a mesmerizing 40-foot tornado made of a foggy mist spins and swirls behind her, Lisa then peppers the kids with questions about what happens when bath water goes down the drain or when chocolate milk gets mixed in a glass.

“It twirls around,” one little girl piped up.

“So, then,” Lisa asked, while nodding approval, “what do a bathtub, chocolate milk and a tornado have in common? They’re all vortexes.”

Such are the kinds of simple explanations to complex natural phenomena that kids – and adults – can learn at “Science Storms,” the museum’s new permanent, 26,000-square-foot exhibit that opened last month and is worth a visit.

Spread across two floors of the museum and requiring at least a couple of hours to fully explore, “Science Storms” is a wonderland that allows visitors to not only investigate the basic principles of chemistry and physics responsible for nature’s biggest marvels, but also to get the opportunity to interact with and even control these marvels themselves.

With Tornado Vortex, you can manipulate that 40-foot mist tornado by controlling its air pressure and wind speed. At the Lightning Charge display, you can witness the awe-inspiring power of a high-voltage electrical storm produced by a giant Tesla coil suspended high above the museum floor and stretching 20 feet in diameter.

And with Avalanche Motion, you can trigger a 20-foot landslide of garnet sand and glass beads to experience the unexpected and hypnotizing beauty of granular dynamics.

You just have to wait patiently.

“Do you want to give another little boy a turn?” a mother asked her son as he toyed with the Avalanche Motion controls, before looking at me with a smile and adding, “Or a grown-up?”

At “Science Storms,” there’s also the opportunity to wage a battle of fire vs. water to see how a flame reacts to different conditions, make giant rainbows and even unleash your own tsunami across a 30-foot water tank to study the power and motion of waves.

In fact, so impressive is “Science Storms” that last month it left famously chatty WGN-Ch. 9 meteorologist Tom Skilling almost speechless in a newspaper story, as he was quoted as repeatedly uttering little more than “Wow” while touring the sprawling exhibit.

“Creating transformative experiences that get people excited about the world around them is what the Museum of Science and Industry does best,” said David Mosena, president and CEO of the Museum of Science and Industry. “And exhibits like ‘Science Storms’ are our most powerful teaching tools.”

And as much as I enjoyed the interactivity of the exhibits, I think learned even more from watching the Discover Channel-worthy video presentations displayed on large screens throughout “Science Storms.” Featuring leading researchers and scientists from places like NASA, the United States Geological Survey and the University of Chicago, the videos had me walking out of MSI with a whole lot more scientific understanding than I walked in with.

And as a history buff, the display cases at “Science Storms” provided me with a fill of fascinating historical artifacts, as well.

My favorites included the first light bulb to ever be lit in public (1879), a 345-year-old telescope and a frightening breathing helmet used by firefighters in 1880. I was also captivated by the first copy of Sir Isaac Newton’s “Opticks,” circa 1704, in which the legendary thinker recorded his experiments into the physics of light, including a description of his prism experiment, touted to be one of the most important experiments in history.

As I left “Science Storms,” I strolled past a young boy as he exclaimed to his mom and grandmother, “This is so much fun!”

Even worth taking a bath for, one might say.

“Science Storms” is included in general admission at the Museum of Science and Industry, 5700 South Lake Shore Drive, which is $15 for adults, $14 for seniors, and $10 for children ages 3 to 11. City of Chicago residents receive a discounted price.

Today’s column from the Kankakee Daily Journal and The (Ottawa, Ill.) Times …

Cubs lore? It’s only ‘Natural’ in Room 509

The WISCH LIST

April 10, 2010

Baseball, perhaps more than any other sport, is a game of numbers.

From 60 feet, 6 inches and .406, to 61 and 755 (I don’t recognize other home run records), the National Pastime just drips with digits. And the Chicago Cubs, perhaps more than any team not named the Yankees, have an identity that’s defined by them.

Numerals such as 1908, 1945 and 2003 are branded on the ballclub like “Rawlings” on horsehide. And, for better or worse (mostly worse), Cubs fans know each of them as well as their own birthdates.

As for myself, I’ve long been able to tick off any number of Cubs-related numbers at the drop of a cap. But it wasn’t until this past weekend that I became familiar with a new one (509) that’s, in fact, quite old.

And a “Natural” fit in both Cubs – and baseball – lore.

So, turn the key with me and enter Room 509 of the Sheffield House Hotel, the most famous place in Chicago that you barely knew existed.

And where I slept last Sunday night.

Located just 427 paces from Wrigley Field at 3834 N. Sheffield Ave., the Sheffield House – known until recent years as the Hotel Carlos – was constructed in the 1920s.

But Room 509 – the location where Chicago Cubs shortstop Billy Jurges was famously shot by showgirl Violet Valli in an incident credited for partially inspiring Bernard Malamud’s 1952 novel “The Natural” and the 1984 Robert Redford movie by the same name – remains stuck nearly eight decades in the past.

On July 6, 1932, the Cubs were one month from ripping off 25 wins in 30 games to propel themselves to a World Series during which Babe Ruth belted his (So-)Called Shot at Wrigley Field and the Yankees swept their way to the championship.

On the morning of July 6, however, the Cubs were merely struggling through a four-game losing streak. And 25-year-old Billy Jurges was sound asleep at the Hotel Carlos, where he lived during the season, when Valli rang him from the front desk, asking to see the man she wanted to marry and discuss their “love affair.”

Valli – reportedly drunk on gin and having left at home a suicide note addressed to her brother that read, “Life without Billy isn’t worth living, but why should I leave this world alone?” – was told by Jurges that she could come up to Room 509.

An argument soon broke out and Valli pulled out a small .25-caliber pistol, shooting Jurges in the side, rump and hand before suffering a wound to her own arm when he wrestled the weapon from her.

Charges were never filed, but Jurges spent 16 days on the disabled list, Valli earned a Vaudeville show from the ensuing notoriety and a famous book and movie were ultimately inspired.

And last week, with the calendar on the cusp of a new baseball season and me being me, I got the itch – naturally – to visit Room 509 myself.

So after spending Easter with my family in Bourbonnais, I reserved Room 509 by phone and left for Chicago with my mom telling me, “If you get scared, call us.”

Now, I didn’t really think there was much reason for concern – the Sheffield House sits less than three blocks from my own apartment, after all – although the aged hotel’s current patrons are, well, definitely not Major Leaguers.

As I drove north, I thought about what to bring to Room 509, where two years ago the Chicago Sun-Times had a psychic convene with Jurges’ supposed ghost. A Milton Bradley voodoo doll? The shrunken – and bleached – head of Sammy Sosa? Goat soup?

Eventually, I opted to go pretty much empty-handed (like the Cubs themselves) and entered the hotel’s 1920s-style, terra cotta lobby armed with only my backpack, laptop computer and a downloaded video of “The Natural.”

Upon check-in, I walked up five flights of stairs past eerie hallways filled not with people, but stacked mattresses and furniture. And in a corner of the top floor, I found Room 509 and turned the key.

Inside, was a tiny, white-walled space that couldn’t have looked much different when Billy Jurges called it home. Measuring about 14 feet by 9 feet, the spartan room featured a bed, a dresser and mirror, a small color TV, one table, a broken chair and an ancient refrigerator that didn’t work.

The room’s phone had no dial tone. I couldn’t get the hotel’s Wi-Fi signal in my room. And my iPhone wouldn’t even allow me to post a status update to Facebook.

I thought, either the spirit of Billy Jurges doesn’t like technology, or Rod Serling was about to appear and tell viewers that I’ve just entered the Twilight Zone.

Undeterred, I laid down on the bed and began watching “The Natural” on my computer as lightning and rain crashed down – both on the movie screen and beyond Sheffield Avenue outside my window.

Three hours later, having seen Roy Hobbs get shot and then redeem his career, I dozed off and awoke the next morning for Opening Day with sunshine – and no showgirls – outside the room.

Although I think the Cubs could have actually used Violet Valli later that afternoon.

She packed more pop than anyone in their lineup.

Today’s column from the Kankakee Daily Journal and The (Ottawa, Ill.) Times …

Wisconsin boy’s memory has Packers fans Bearing Down

The WISCH LIST

April 3, 2010

The city of Burlington, Wis., sits about 70 miles closer to Soldier Field than it does Lambeau Field. But make no mistake about it, the Racine County town is firmly planted in Packers Country.

Or, at least, until recently it was.

“We do know that a lot of people in Burlington now own Bears shirts because of my son,” said Marie Baker, who lives with her family in the close-knit town of about 10,000, located 35 miles southwest of Milwaukee. “They may have hated wearing them, as some did complain. But they loved Slade.

“And Slade loved the Bears.”

On Monday, Jan. 4, 7-year-old Slade Baker was sledding with his 8-year-old brother, Damian, and a friend about a half-block from home when Slade’s sled carried him onto the ice covering the Fox River.

As Slade was walking back to the shore, the ice gave way and he was swept away by the river’s current below. Immediate efforts to save Slade failed and the next morning rescue workers located his body beneath the ice about 250 yards downstream, near downtown Burlington.

On Jan. 6., Slade’s obituary ran in the Kenosha News saying how, “He enjoyed football, baseball and basketball. He was a die-hard Bears fan. He was a ‘hands on,’ outgoing boy. He was a hard worker, a joker and an instigator, who lived every moment to the fullest.”

And thanks to Chicago Bears linebacker Nick Roach, Slade’s memory is still very much alive this weekend during the Final Four.

Even if Roach’s national championship pick (Marquette) is not.

“Hey, you gotta do what you gotta do,” Roach, a Milwaukee native, said about picking his hometown Golden Warriors to win it all. “You have to remember where you came from.”

That’s just what Roach did on Feb. 12 when he delayed a trip home to Milwaukee so he could swing by Burlington to attend a Slade Baker Fundraiser event.

“I heard from a friend about how big a Bears fan he was,” Roach said about Slade, who was buried in a Bears jersey and became a fan of the Monsters of the Midway because his best friend was. “And after the fundraiser I wanted to do a little more.”

Last month, Roach helped organize an online NCAA Tournament Pick ’Em contest in which more than 100 people made donations for the chance to bump basketball heads with the fourth-year Bear. The champion of the competition – which has raised an extra $1,200 for the Slade Baker Scholarship Fund – will win a pair of tickets to a 2010 Bears home game, while everyone who finishes ahead of Roach gets an opportunity to win a signed football or Bears shirt.

And as of right now, a lot of people have that opportunity – Roach currently sits at 95th place in his own pool.

“I just wanted to give everyone a chance to win,” the fourth-year Bear said with a chuckle. “If we had been picking football games, though, it wouldn’t have been fair.”

Sports prognostications aside, Slade’s father, Matt, said, “Nick has really made an impact up here. Everything he’s done has meant a lot.”

Marie Baker added that the family even got Slade’s grandfather – a lifelong Packers fan – to wear a Bears pin beside his Packers tie in recent weeks.

“And we know Slade was loving it,” she said. “His brother Damian is a Packers fan, so in our house during football time, it was a lot of fun. The two boys would talk smack about each other’s team. But now all these Packers fans here in Burlington have a different view on Nick Roach and the Bears.

“What Nick did was life-changing in Burlington.”

Anyone interested in making a donation to the Slade Baker Scholarship Fund can send an envelope to North Shore Bank, 116 South Pine Street, Burlington, WI 53105 along with a note it’s for Slade’s Fund.

Final Forlorn

Detroit has 8-year-old Ford Field (and the 2009 Final Four). Indianapolis has 2-year-old Lucas Oil Stadium (and the 2010 Final Four). And Chicago?

Well, it has 7-year-old Soldier Field (and bupkiss).

While on the topic of the Bears and NCAA basketball, I was thinking how nice it would be if this weekend the Final Four was being held beneath a retractable roof at Soldier Field.

Alas, it’s not … and never will be.

If the city of Chicago had any foresight, it would have decided a decade ago to construct a multi-purpose facility along Lake Shore Drive, rather awkwardly cramming a modern stadium inside the skeleton of old Soldier Field.

With Detroit and Indy also able to host Super Bowls, Mayor Daley & Co. really dropped the ball on that one.

In more sports than one.